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[球员资料] 博鲁什的本周愤怒列表

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发表于 2010-9-27 23:07:28 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
AAAAHHHHHHHH I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS IS A LIST OF THINGS THAT MADE ME ANGRY THIS WEEK:  

啊啊啊啊啊我是阿图尔博鲁什,这是本周让我愤怒的一系列东西:


1. WATCHING SEBASTIEN FREY -- OHMYGOD I AM SO SICK OF NOT PLAYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF I WANTED TO WASTE MY CAREER SITTING AROUND AND WATCHING ANOTHER GOALKEEPER PLAY INSTEAD OF ME I WOULD HEADBUTT A GIRAFFE BECAUSE THAT IS JUST STUPID!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH THE GIRAFFE JUST BIT ME!!!!!!!
1. 看塞巴弗雷 —— 我的天啊我已经受够了上不了场啦!!!如果我想要浪费我的职业生涯总是坐着看另一个门将比赛而不是我的话我会去头顶一头长颈鹿,因为那样是很愚蠢的!我靠,长颈鹿刚刚咬我了!


2. THE HAMBURG DERBY -- AHHHHHHHH WHY COULDN'T I BE THERE!!!!!!! THERE IS NOTHING I LOVE MORE THAN BEING BEATEN BY RIOT POLICE AND BLASTED WITH A FIRE HOSE!!!!!!!!! INSTEAD I WAS SITTING ON THE BENCH WATCHING SEBASTIEN FREY LOSE TO LAZIO!!!!!!! THEY NEED TO EITHER PLAY ME OR BLAST ME WITH A FIRE HOSE!!!!!!! TO BE HONEST I WOULD ACTUALLY PREFER THE LATTER!!!!!!  

2. 汉堡德比 —— 啊啊啊啊为什么我不在那里?没有什么比被防暴警察暴打和被灭火水龙管喷更让我喜爱的了!我做的反而是坐在板凳上看我们输给拉齐奥!佛罗伦萨需要要么上我比赛要么用灭火水龙管来喷我!老实说我会更喜欢后者。


3. CORN -- THE OTHER DAY I ASKED SEBASTIEN FREY WHAT HIS FAVORITE FOOD IS!!!!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID?!?!??!!? CHOCOLATE!!!!!!! BUT I BET HE WOULD PUT CHOCOLATE ON CORN AND REALLY ENJOY IT!!!!!!! THAT COUNTS AS CIRCUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE THAT FREY IS WORKING FOR THE EVIL CORN OVERLORDS!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH STOP DOUBTING ME!!!!!!!!
3. 玉米 —— 有一天我问弗雷他最喜欢吃什么,你猜他说什么?巧克力!!但我肯定他能在玉米上放巧克力也会很喜欢吃!这样就是间接证据证明弗雷为邪恶的玉米效力!啊啊啊别怀疑我!


4. FACEBOOK GROUP TO GET PUYOL TO PLAY UNTIL HE'S 40 -- IF THIS WORKS I AM DEFINITELY GOING TO START A GROUP DEMANDING THAT SEBASTIEN FREY EAT A LIVE RABIES-INFESTED SQUIRREL IF EIGHT MILLION PEOPLE JOIN!!!!!! I'VE ALREADY ASKED HIM TO DO IT SEVERAL TIMES BUT HE JUST IGNORES ME!!!!!! AHHHHHH MAYBE I SHOULD SCREAM IT TO HIS FACE INSTEAD OF IN MY BASEMENT LATE AT NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

4. 一个要普约尔踢到40岁的Facebook群 —— 如果这个真的有用的话我会建一个群说如果8百万人加入了弗雷就要吃一个感染了狂犬病的松鼠。我已经问过弗雷几次了但他总是不理我!啊啊啊也许我需要对他大叫而不是晚上在我的地下室里大叫。


5. DRUG MULE REFEREES -- SMUGGLING DRUGS IS WRONG!!!!!! ONE TIME I TRIED TO SMUGGLE M&M'S THROUGH AN AIRPORT AND WHEN SECURITY DISCOVERED THEM I SHOUTED "EAT DRUGS!!!!!" AND RAN!!!!! THEY NEVER CAUGHT ME BUT I'M PRETTY SURE THE MANHUNT IS STILL GOING!!!!!!!!
5. 裁判走私毒品(笔者注:2002年世界杯意大利对韩国的裁判,莫雷诺,上周在纽约机场因为被发现身上带有海洛因而被捕)—— 走私毒品是非常不对的!有一次我想走私M&M'S巧克力通过机场,当安检人员发现它们时我大叫“吃药吧!”然后赶紧跑了。他们没有抓到我,但我肯定他们现在还在寻找我!


6. BALL BOY GETTING TOUGH WITH GOALKEEPER -- IF A BALL BOY EVER DID THIS TO ME I WOULD POLITELY ASK HIM WHY HE IS SUCH A BRATTY LITTLE BOY!!!!!! AND THEN I WOULD PUT HIM IN A BOX AND SHIP HIM TO THE SUN WITH THE ANGRIEST DROPKICK OF ALL TIME!!!!!!!! HAVE FUN INSTANTLY DISINTEGRATING BRAT!!!!!!!

6. 捡球小孩要跟门将打架 (笔者注:在比甲小球会Lierse主场1-1豪门安德莱赫特,补时阶段一捡球小孩尝试拖延时间而不去给客队门将捡球,并且作出姿势要与他对抗) —— 如果有一个小孩要这样对我做的话我会先很礼貌的问他为什么他是这么令人讨厌的小孩,然后我把他塞进一个盒子里对他朝太阳的方向来开大脚,史上最愤怒的门将大脚!慢慢分解吧小屁孩!


7. MY ANNOYING NEW NEIGHBOR ENZO -- SO ON THURSDAY I DECIDED THAT I COULD NO LONGER LIVE NEXT TO A LYING SLAVE TO THE CORN!!!!!!! I WAS DRAWING PICTURES OF UNICORNS THAT CAN RIDE TANDEM BICYCLES AND DECAPITATE OLD PEOPLE ON MY WALLS WHEN I DECIDED THIS!!!!!!! I THEN SPRINTED OUT OF MY HOUSE AND RAN OVER AND DELIVERED ROUNDHOUSE KICKS TO HIS FRONT DOOR UNTIL HE OPENED IT!!!!!!!!! HE LOOKED CONFUSED AND SAID SOMETHING IN ITALIAN SO I SCREAMED "I'M VERY SORRY ENZO BUT YOU MUST LEAVE YOUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!! FOREVER!!!!!!" AND I SAID IT IN A WAY SO HE WOULD KNOW THAT I WOULD MELT HIS FACE WITH MY VOCAL CHORDS IF HE DIDN'T!!!!!!!!! THEN I GAVE UP A SUITCASE FULL OF MONEY AND TOLD HIM TO NEVER COME BACK!!!!!!!! HE LOOKED SURPRISINGLY HAPPY WHEN HE TOOK IT!!!!!!!!!! I THEN SPENT THE NEXT SEVERAL HOURS SENTING OFF FIREWORKS IN HIS HOUSE TO RID IT OF THE CORN SPIRITS AND ALSO JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO SET OFF FIREWORKS IN HOUSES!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH I HOPE ENZO LOSES THE BAG OF MONEY I GAVE HIM AND HAS TO HUNT FOR FOOD IN CARLES PUYOL'S HAIR FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE!!!!!!!!!

7. 我的烦人的新邻居恩佐 —— 周四的时候我决定我不想住他旁边了!我在自家墙上画能骑前后自行车和斩首老年人的独角兽,然后我飞快的跑出我的房子到他的前门使劲踢门直到他打开门。他很疑惑地看我然后说了些意大利语,于是我大叫“我很抱歉恩佐但是你必须马上离开你的房子!永远!” 我用那种方式说的好让他知道如果他不照做的话我会用我的和音融化他的脸!然后我给他一满箱的钱告诉他别回来。他看起来很高兴,然后花了几个小时在他家里放烟花,当然我也喜欢在房子里放烟花。啊啊啊我希望恩佐丢失我给他的一箱钱然后需要在普约尔的头发里猎食!

I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS HAS BEEN MY RAGE LIST. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! GOD BLESS!!!!!!
我是阿图尔博鲁什,这是我的愤怒列表。下周再见!上帝保佑!

(各位,这是人家的幽默,有的不必较真,虽然有点离谱)

[ 本帖最后由 bruceho 于 2010-9-28 04:33 编辑 ]
楼主新帖
  • TA的每日心情
    擦汗
    2014-2-28 17:13
  • 签到天数: 2 天

    [LV.1]初来乍到I

    发表于 2010-9-27 23:28:06 | 显示全部楼层
    这真是博鲁什本人写的么?我怎么觉得他有点精神分裂呢

    该用户从未签到

    发表于 2010-9-27 23:29:14 | 显示全部楼层
    天啊我们更衣室里有这样的家伙会是什么样子 弗雷一定不停的打喷嚏
  • TA的每日心情
    郁闷
    2013-7-5 21:48
  • 签到天数: 13 天

    [LV.3]偶尔看看II

    发表于 2010-9-27 23:33:53 | 显示全部楼层
    额………
  • TA的每日心情

    2018-10-25 20:15
  • 签到天数: 1431 天

    [LV.10]以坛为家III

    发表于 2010-9-27 23:34:43 | 显示全部楼层
    对F1怨念很深啊
  • TA的每日心情
    开心
    2024-8-6 09:56
  • 签到天数: 2561 天

    [LV.Master]伴坛终老

    发表于 2010-9-27 23:36:38 | 显示全部楼层
    他的话太多了 呵呵
  • TA的每日心情
    奋斗
    2013-5-19 19:54
  • 签到天数: 1 天

    [LV.1]初来乍到I

    发表于 2010-9-27 23:54:29 | 显示全部楼层
    适当得发泄是应该的!

    该用户从未签到

    发表于 2010-9-28 00:10:09 | 显示全部楼层
    开始喜欢这小子了 当然我们的门神还是F1

    该用户从未签到

    发表于 2010-9-28 02:35:49 | 显示全部楼层
    这个应该是好事者以博鲁什的身份发的帖子吧,不会真是他本人写的吧?不然不是完全挑明了他现在对不能上场及其不满?

    该用户从未签到

     楼主| 发表于 2010-9-28 04:31:45 | 显示全部楼层
    原帖由 chrisolo 于 2010-9-27 23:28 发表
    这真是博鲁什本人写的么?我怎么觉得他有点精神分裂呢

    不是精神分裂,而是脾气暴躁,请看他在凯尔特人时代的事迹,每年的老字号德比他都会在宗教上挑衅流浪者球迷引起苏格兰议会和新教徒的不满

    作为一个新教徒,我以前也不喜欢他。但现在他是佛罗伦萨一员,我需要支持他

    [ 本帖最后由 bruceho 于 2010-9-28 04:35 编辑 ]
  • TA的每日心情

    2024-4-21 21:23
  • 签到天数: 534 天

    [LV.9]以坛为家II

    发表于 2010-9-28 09:11:35 | 显示全部楼层
    哈哈,弗雷总是不理他,他这么神经,谁能和他有共同语言啊,除非也变成疯子,会被同化的

    该用户从未签到

    发表于 2010-9-28 10:41:11 | 显示全部楼层
    谁知道这网是什么网
  • TA的每日心情
    郁闷
    2021-1-22 08:42
  • 签到天数: 1730 天

    [LV.Master]伴坛终老

    发表于 2010-9-28 15:51:14 | 显示全部楼层
    enzo每次都是亮点啊
  • TA的每日心情
    难过
    2021-1-8 12:25
  • 签到天数: 50 天

    [LV.5]常住居民I

    发表于 2010-9-28 17:48:59 | 显示全部楼层
    玉米啊。

    该用户从未签到

    发表于 2010-10-2 14:16:30 | 显示全部楼层
    。。。。。。。。。。。无语嘞,什么人啊
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